Breakfast

Look, I love and appreciate all three of the macro groups, but you are all probably aware by now that I am a huge proponent of a healthy daily dose of hormone supporting fats. I’m not afraid of carbs and I know that protein is great for muscle growth, but fat just has a special place in my heart. It keeps my blood sugar stable, makes me feel full, supports my hair and my skin, and frankly, it tastes great.

I consider myself a connoisseur of fats. I’ve tried them all. Every form of nut butter, oil, fat packs, avo mouse, coconut oil, keto cup, and seed butter… you name, I’ve probably tried it. People ask me all the time which ones are best but choosing my favorite form of fat is like trying to choose a favorite child because I love and appreciate them all differently.

Well, that is except for one.

Just between you and I, there is one fatty snack that I simply cannot live without. It is the yin to my yang. It’s what I think about when I wake up in the morning and the last thing I long for before I go to bed at night.

And that is FBOMB’s nut butters and oils packets.

I stumbled upon FBOMB totally by chance. C and I ran a RAGNAR with some coworkers last April and someone stuffed the free FBOMB nut butter packets into my backpack when we were hurriedly trying to clean out our van. Nut butter packets were never really my thing, but I also hate to waste food, so I packed them into the glove compartment of my car and forgot about them.

Fast forward to mid-June. Half of California is on fire and it is hotter than hell outside. Yours truly was trapped on the 405 trying to cross El Lay in the heat of the afternoon after a particularly long day spent crawling in and out of bug-infested manholes on a construction site. The fires were definitely not making traffic any better and I was tired, I was sweaty, I was stinky, I was hungry, I was cranky, I wanted to be home, and there was no way in hell I was getting off of the bumper-to-bumper freeway to grab a snack.

In a fit of self-pity and despair, I tore apart the interior of my Volkswagen bug in search of something, ANYTHING, that I could put into my stomach. I dug into the driver’s side door pocket, emptied the piles of napkins and used chap sticks out of the center console, and pulled out every single pair of sunglasses out from the nooks and crannies of the dashboard of the car. But it wasn’t until I flung open the glove compartment and pulled the entirety of its contents out onto the passenger seat next to me that I did find, lo and behold, those bright orange FBOMB macadamia nut butter packets, shining back at me.

As soon as that nut butter hit my taste buds, I knew that I could never go back. The sun shone a little brighter, the colors of the 405 freeway got a little clearer, strangers were smiling in their cars, the birds started singing, a mouse started collecting loose pearls from the ground to sew together my gown for the ball (… or something like that). I’m not trying to be dramatic, but let me tell you, my day TURNED AROUND.

Unfortunately, FBOMBs are not available in stores (at least as of recent in southern California). I try not to order things online, but FBOMBs are an exception. They’re worth it. It’s the first thing I eat every morning I’m at work. They taste AMAZING, the ingredients are so simple, and they prep my stomach for a full day of digesting.

After that life changing day in December, I fell hard for the macadamia nut FBOMB packs. I immediately became a loyal consumer. I really thought I knew what love was… BUT BOY WAS I WRONG. Because soon after I messed up an Amazon order (lol what’s new right) and accidently ordered myself the coconut macadamia nut butter combo packets. I didn’t think I could love FBOMBs any more than I already did. I thought I had it all. I didn’t. I had nothing. Because I didn’t have the coconut macadamia nut flavor.

But LOL this post isn’t even about FBOMBs so can we just move on already??

Inspired by my unfailing love of the flavor of the coconut macadamia nut FBOMB pack, the Macadamia Coconut Donuts were created. Although it PAINED me to put the FBOMB nut butter into the batter and not into my mouth, the reward proved to be worth the heartbreak.

These donuts have the perfect texture and come in at only 7 net carbs per donuts. They are so filling, and the rich macadamia nut flavor goes perfectly with your morning cup of joe. They also have 7 grams of protein, which is nothing to squawk at, and a whopping 21 grams of fat to keep you satisfied all morning long.

When I’m feeling spicy af, I top them with a paleo white chocolate icing that is unbelievably easy to whip up and adds a fun chocolatey flavor to the donuts. But trust me when I say this, these donuts really hold up on their own.

So lets stop talking about FBOMBs (jk I’ll never stop talking about FBOMBs) and get into the recipe!

Macadamia and Coconut Donuts w/ White Cocoa Glaze

Paleo, sugar-free, keto, low-carb, grain-free, gluten-free

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Prep Time 10 mins

Cook Time 18 mins

Total Time 28 mins

Course Breakfast

Cuisine American

Servings 4 donuts

Ingredients

  

Macadamia Coconut Donut

• 3 eggs
• 3 tbsp coconut oil (liquid)
• 1 Macadamia Nut F bomb
• 1 tbsp coconut sugar (optional)
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 1/8 tsp xantham gum
• 1/2 tsp vanilla
• 3 tbsp almond/coconut milk
• 3/8 cup coconut flour

White Chocolate Coconut Icing

• 2 tbsp coconut butter
• 1 tbsp cocoa butter (or just more coconut butter if you’re not a bitter cocoa fan!)
• 1 tsp coconut flour
• 1 tsp coconut sugar
• 1 tbsp shredded coconut (for topping)
• 1 tbsp chopped macadamia nuts (for topping)

Instructions

 

Donuts

• Preheat oven to 350 F and grease your donut pan.
• Combine coconut flour, coconut sugar, baking soda, and xantham gum in a large bowl.
• Separate egg yokes and egg whites. Add yokes, coconut oil, macadamia nut butter, almond milk and vanilla to your dry mixture. Blend well.
• Whip egg whites until they form a firm peak. Fold into your donut mixture.
• Spoon mixture into donut pan and bake for 17-20 minutes. 

Icing

• Combine all ingredients in a small saucepan (except coconut sugar, shredded coconut, and mac nuts). Heat on low until melted (this doesn’t take long so keep your eyes on it!!). 
• Pour over the donuts. Top with coconut sugar, shredded coconut, and mac nuts.

Notes

DISCLAIMER: I live in a shit apartment with a shit oven. When I preheat my oven, I also preheat my apartment. Remember this when considering my baking times.

Keyword breakfast, coconut, donut, gluten-free, grain-free, keto, low carb, macadamia nut, paleo

Usually I like to start a recipe with a good quip, a little insight into the recipe inspiration, or an entertaining story for you folks. However, you will not find any of those options in today’s post.

Because sometimes your girl just wants a chocolate chip cookie.

Nothing fancy. No hidden superfoods or ulterior motives. No witty asides or embarrassing stories from the past. Sometimes I just want my apartment to smell like childhood and I want to bite into and ooey goey fluffy n delish chocolate chip cookie.

So today I give to you exactly that: a paleo, grain-free, gluten-free, low carb chocolate chip cookie that’s guaranteed to scratch that chocolate chip itch without all the extra sugar and grains that typically accompany our favorite classic. These cookies are breakfast friendly, tummy friendly, and are the perfect boost for some mid-day energy with a side of old school comfort. So without further ado, paleo chocolate chip cookie heaven 😊

Chocolate Chip Cookies

(Paleo, grain-free, gluten-free, low-carb)

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Prep Time 8 mins

Total Time 16 mins

Course Breakfast, Dessert

Cuisine American

Servings 12 cookies

Calories 110 kcal

Ingredients

  

• 1/2 cup almond flour
• 1/8 cup coconut flour
• 1/8 cup coconut sugar (or more if you like sweeter cookies)
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 1 pinch salt
• 1 egg
• 1/3 cup almond butter
• 1 tbsp coconut oil (liquid)
• 1 tsp vanilla
• 1/4 cup chocolate chips

Instructions

 

• Preheat your oven to 350F and line or grease your baking sheet.
• Combine dry ingredients in a large bowl. Mix well. Add wet ingredients and mix well.
• Place cookies (~1 tbsp of dough) on sheet. The cookies don’t spread much, so pat down the balls of dough with your hand to desired width. Bake 8-11 minutes and enjoy 😊

Notes

DISCLAIMER: I live in a shit apartment with a shit oven. When I preheat my oven, I also preheat my apartment. Remember this when considering my baking times.

Keyword almond butter, almond flour, chocolate chip, cookies, easy, fast, gluten-free, grain-free, low carb, low-sugar, one-bowl, paleo, quick

WARNING: This recipe is for serious chocolate lovers only.

One of my BFF’s, E (not to be confused with C), and I were reminiscing over lunch on the good ol’ days of middle school. TBH there’s a lot to cringe at when we think back to our pubescent years… the low-rider sweatpants, the tiny Coach purses, getting excommunicated from our lunch table for wearing an ugly shirt (to be fair, it was a REALLY ugly shirt but my mom wouldn’t let me buy Abercrombie okay?!), the unbelievably painful interactions with boys, and we shouldn’t breeze by my shining gym class moment—the one time, ONE SINGLE TIME, I hit the softball, only to, bursting with excitement, throw the bat (hard) into the legs of our paraplegic catcher and then proceed to run the bases backward. Perhaps the best part was that our gym teacher felt so bad for me that he let me keep my hit. Quick reminder—there is also a significantly injured (at my hands) paraplegic classmate in the picture who didn’t quite muster the same level of sympathy.

Not only did he let me keep my hit, he let me stay on third base.

Don’t worry though, I was tagged out before scoring a run.

… I made a lot of friends that day.

ANYWAY back to the glory of middle school. Transitioning from boys and girls to men and women. Getting our periods and dropping our balls (get your mind out of the gutter, I’m referring to middle school Grit in gym class). Taking our first steps into adulthood.  And getting to choose what we eat at lunch instead of getting the standardized lunch meals of elementary school past.

In retrospect, I really see where the push for healthier school lunches came from. E and I were very consistent in our choices. A balanced diet of Gatorade, chicken poppers, sour patch kids, and hostess cupcakes.

Ah yes, THE HOSTESS CUPCAKES.

I grew up in a healthy-ish household. My pops in particular would have to be blind and bound before letting anything Hostess into our cupboards. But at school, he had no domain over my hydrogenated oil consumption, and I leveraged this to its maximum capacity.

Flash forward to my lunch with E. After we finished our tacos and our trip down memory lane, I hit the kitchen with a mission. A Hostess cupcake mission.

Look man, I still love the baked goods from middle school past. But traditional baked goods just don’t love me back. Thanks in part to my severely damaged metabolism, the high sugar and carb levels lead me to sugar crashes and serious mood swings. My face breaks out. My inner Mariah Carrey breaks out. It’s just… it’s not good for anyone involved.

So born of my Hostess mission is a healthy look-a-like. A Faux-stess if you will (okay I’m sorry).  A breakfast-friendly, sugar-less, chocolate packed, paleo, keto (3 net carb!), Hostess look-a-like to itch a scratch that would make the 13-year-old versions of us proud.

I love starting my day with these fatty muffins because 1) Chocolate + Coffee = DUH and 2) The fat really preps my day for a full day of digestion. TBH I wasn’t going to post these bad boys for awhile, but I brought these to a work event and so many people asked for the recipe that I decided just to save myself the emails and post it. So by popular demand (MAN I’ve always wanted to say that!) my Faux Hostess Chocolate Coconut Cupcake:

Faux-Hostess Chocolate Coconut Cupcakes

Paleo, Keto, Grain-free, Gluten-free, Low carb

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Prep Time 10 mins

Cook Time 20 mins

Total Time 30 mins

Course Breakfast, Dessert

Cuisine American

Servings 12 cupcakes

Ingredients

  

Chocolate Cupcake

• 1 cup almond flour
• 1/8 cup coconut flour
• 2 tbsp protein (I used chocolate Tera’s Whey)
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp baking soda
• 4 tbsp cacao powder (or cocoa powder)
• 1/4 tsp xanthan gum
• 1/2 cup pumpkin (or mashed banana if you want some sweetness)
• 2 eggs
• 2 tbsp ghee (melted)
• 1/8 cup coconut oil (liquid)
• 1/3 cup almond milk

Coconut Cream Filling

• 2 tbsp coconut butter
• 1 tsp almond milk
• 1/2 cup shredded unsweetened coconut
• 1/4 tsp almond extract

Instructions

 

Coconut Cream Filling

• Combine all ingredients and mix well. It should have a consistency similar to play dough 🙂 Set aside while you make the cupcakes.

Chocolate Cupcake

• Grease or line your muffin tin and preheat your oven to 400F. 
• Combine your dry ingredients in a large bowl.
• Separate your egg whites and yokes. In a medium bowl, combine egg yokes, pumpkin (or mashed banana), ghee, coconut oil, and milk.
• Whip your egg whites until they form a firm peak.
• Pour your wet ingredients into your dry ingredients and mix well. Fold in your egg whites.
• Separate your batter into two halves. Fill your cupcake tin half full with the first half of the batter. On top of your half full muffin tins, place approx one rounded heaping tsp of Coconut Cream filling. Cover filling with the second half of batter.
• Bake for 15-20 minutes at 400F. Take cupcakes out when a toothpick comes out clean. Top with melted chocolate if you wish (you do) and store in fridge.

Notes

I ALWAYS top my muffins with a little melted chocolate. I made the curlies on these guys with leftover frosting but LETS BE REAL I did it for the gram and don’t do it when I’m baking these for every day life (though it is pretty darn cute, huh?)

 

Full disclaimer, I live in a shit apartment with a shit oven. When I preheat my oven to 350F, I preheat my kitchen to 350F. Take all my baking times with a grain of salt!

Keyword chocolate, coconut, cupcake, dessert, gluten-free, grain-free, healthy, Hostess, keto, muffin, paleo

My dearest blogiverse friends, I have something very special to share with you today: a grain-free, gluten-free, sugar-free, low carb, heaven in the mouth, macadamia nut coffee cake muffin.

I know that’s a lot of words. I know it sounds like a tall order. And look, I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that this is a simple “one dirty dish” kind of a recipe. But that’s because we’re not living a one-dirty-dish kind of lives now, are we?

This recipe has evolved from a much-loved macadamia nut coffee cake recipe from my grandma’s health food store The Third Street Market in Park Rapids, Minnesota (look it up, fall in love). After many iterations, many attempts, and many, many failures, we have managed to tweak her original recipe into paleo keto euphoria.  

When you bit into these muffins, you will taste Midwest popover meets crumbly moist coffee cake meets all the tropical and rich flavors of Hawaii. It’s a sunny-day-good-day-worth-the-dirty-dishes-full-of-love type of a muffin. Sweetened only with banana, this high fat, highly caffeinated muffin is the perfect way to start your day with stompach-filling, brain-powering, taste bud-loving fuel. And the bonus secret ingredient? Bone broth. (Yes, I did just drop a superfood. Excuse me for a moment while I bend down to pick it up.)

Another bonus of these muffins is that when you describe the experience of making these to your friends (note: if you share the actual muffins with said friends, you are a better person than I) you will sound fancy af (can you say “banana espresso reduction”?). I can already see the beautiful Instagram captions in your future.

And finally, these muffins will hit you hard with a heavy shot of Vitamin D which means what my friends? Yes. They are a good mood foods <3 So without further ado, let’s get into this

Macadamia Nut Coffee Cake Muffins

paleo, grain-free, gluten-free, sugar-free

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Prep Time 10 mins

Cook Time 20 mins

Total Time 30 mins

Course Breakfast, Dessert

Cuisine American

Servings 9 muffins

Ingredients

  

Muffins

• 1/4 cup espresso
• 1/8 cup ghee (or butter)
• 2 eggs
• 1/2 cup mashed bananas (1-2 bananas, depending on size)
• 3/4 cup almond flour
• 1/4 tsp baking soda
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp xanthan gum
• 1 scoop bone broth protein (I used Ancient Nutrition’s Coffee Bone Broth protein)
• 1/8 cup macadamia nuts (chopped)
• coconut butter (for topping, optional)
• shredded coconut (for topping, optional)

Paleo “Fondant” – Scale as needed

• 1 tbsp ghee or butter
• 1 tbsp coconut flour
• 1 tbsp shredded coconut
• 1 tbsp coconut sugar (optional)

Instructions

 

Muffins

• Preheat oven to 350F and grease muffin tin.
• Mash your banana until it is smooth.
• Boil the espresso on the stove on low heat. This also takes approx. one hot minuto so keep your eyes on it. Once boiling, add ½ c of mashed banana and stir. Turn heat down so that the banana doesn’t burn and let simmer for 7-8 minutes. Take it off the stove and let it cool to room temp.
• Breathe in that amazing aroma of warm banana and espresso reduction. Toss in a dash of cinnamon if you’re feeling spicy.
• In a small bowl, mix almond flour, baking soda, baking powder, and bone broth protein. The bone broth protein I used is below. SUBSTITUTION: If you don’t have Ancient Nutrition Coffee Flavor bone broth protein, you can simply go to the store, locate this protein, take it to the cashier, buy it, bring it home, and put it in the muffin recipe because the flavor combo is THE BOMB DIGGITY. (jk you can use any protein or no protein, you do you)
• Separate the eggs and egg whites. Whip the eggs whites until they form a stiff peak.
• In a large bowl, cream butter, egg yolks, and banana espresso mixture.
• With your spatula, fold in half of your flour mixture, then, then the second half of the dry mixture, then the egg whites (I told you it was a touch tedious okay?!)
• Fold in your mac nuts.
• Spoon mixture into greased or lined muffin tin and bake for approx 20-25 minutes. I like to top mine with coconut butter and shredded coconut 🙂 Store in the fridge. 

Paleo “Fondant”

• Combine all ingredients in a small bowl until well integrated (I just use my fingers). Flatten the mixture onto a flat surface and use knifes or cookie cutters to cut fondant into desired shapes. Store in the fridge.

Notes

Because of the espresso, these muffins will look misleadingly dark. Don’t panic and pull them out early! 

Full disclaimer, I live in a shit apartment with a shit oven. When I preheat my oven to 350F, I preheat my kitchen to 350F. Take all my baking times with a grain of salt!

Keyword banana, coconut, coffee cake, gluten-free, grain-free, macadamia nut, muffin, paleo, sugar-free